Dear Liz,

I feel very deflated and misled in my new job. I would never have accepted the job offer if I’d known the real story beforehand!

I work for a startup that had fantastic success with its first product but has been slow to get a follow-up product out the door. The head of Engineering was leading the product development effort and the company had no one in charge of Marketing. They created a new VP of Marketing position this year and I got the job.

I jumped at the opportunity when the headhunter called me. I was in a much larger tech firm working as a Marketing Director (one of four) and seeing virtually no opportunities for advancement. Now I am my company’s first VP of Marketing. I’ve been in the job for nine weeks.

I understand the market need, I’ve had many great discussions with our CEO and head of Engineering and all of us agree on the product road map, the product development schedule and the first iteration of our marketing strategy. The problem is that unbeknownst to me before I took the job, there is a huge impediment between me and the realization of the plan.

Along with the other executives in my company there is a woman who is a founder and a close advisor to our CEO. Her title is “VP of Strategy.” No one told me that this woman existed before I took the job, and she has her fingers in everything. She is a major obstructionist and a control freak. As far as I can see she doesn’t have any direct functional responsibility, but she has the CEO’s ear and a lot of power.

She sent me a rude, dismissive email message before I even met her in person for the first time, and since then she has second-guessed and/or undermined everything I’ve done or tried to do.

I talked to the CEO (who is my direct boss) about my frustration and confusion over my relationship with “Susan.” I asked him why I hadn’t met Susan or interviewed with her before I was hired, seeing how influential she is in the company.

My CEO said “We probably didn’t talk with you about Susan and her role while you were interviewing with us because Susan was going to leave the company. That was her plan. I asked her to stay on and help us get the second-generation product out.

“She was the chief mover-and-shaker behind our first product — the one that is keeping our company afloat right now. Give Susan a chance. She is a brilliant strategist and one of the reasons our company exists.”

He said “Susan will warm up to you — don’t sweat it.” He doesn’t know how Susan operates when he’s not in the room. She is a back-stabber and a jealous, insecure person. She makes comments to me like “You weren’t here when we were working for no pay and trying to meet the payroll every week while developing an industry-changing product at the same time.”

It’s very difficult to deal with her and I don’t know if I want the job anymore. What should I do?

Thanks,

Cassie

Dear Cassie,

Congratulations on your new job! You’ve taken a big step up, and now is your chance to show the world you’re ready for a VP role.

I understand that you’re upset and frustrated. You feel hoodwinked because no one even mentioned the existence of Susan, much less the intersection between her role and yours, before you started the job. Mother Nature is the best teacher.

The next time you consider taking a job with a startup, you’ll not only read the Executive Bios on the company’s website and search LinkedIn and Google for more information on the executive team members, you’ll also ask your hiring manager “Can you please walk me through the executive team roster, and help me understand each person’s role?”

Nobody did you wrong by failing to mention Susan or her history with the company. It was your responsibility to get the team bios during your interview process.

You feel angry and frustrated and you’re thinking about quitting. Is that really the best response to the curve ball Mother Nature has thrown you? You can quit, of course. Here’s how you might describe your decision to leave, let’s say the next time you catch up with your best friend:

“I quit my job — I had to. There was the meanest lady there who was very influential and had the ear of the CEO, so it was impossible for me to do my job. She was hateful and tried to thwart me at every turn so I said ‘To heck with this!’ and I left.”

Does that sound like you, Cassie? I doubt it! Here is another version of the story. This is an imaginary entry in your journal, dated this week:

Well, every new adventure has its challenges! I knew there would be obstacles and hills to climb in my new job — I just didn’t know exactly what they would look like. Who ever does? Turns out my first obstacle is the bad energy between me and a woman named Susan who is my new company’s VP of Strategy. Evidently Susan was instrumental in putting the company on the map. She wanted to quit around the time I was being hired, and the CEO begged her to stay.

Why did he do that? He needs her. What does he need her for? He needs a trusted adviser — that’s my guess. Susan is difficult to deal with. I wonder why? Maybe she’s burned out. Maybe she’s only sticking around because the CEO really wants her to and she wants to help him out. She might have a completely different set of goals for herself. I wonder what her goals are?

She’s miffed that the CEO hired me, probably. I guess anybody in her position might feel that way. She doesn’t hate me personally. She doesn’t even know me. She might be confused about her role in the company and her own career path. I’ve certainly felt that way enough times! My assignment is get altitude on this situation with Susan and handle it. I’ve handled plenty of sticky interpersonal situations before. Did I think that as a VP I’d never have to pick my way through complex relationships?

I’m going to work my way through this obstacle course. It’s a new challenge, but the learning will be incredible.

My CEO relies on Susan, and I trust him. I guess I’m seeing Susan in the worst possible light because I evoked a fear reaction in her just by walking in the door. I’m seeing Susan in her fearful mode, but once I sit down with Susan a few times, hear her concerns, and let her teach me whatever she wants to teach me about this company, herself, her views and the world in general, she is likely to become a lot less fearful and more trusting of me. My job is to build that trust between us.

My goal is to soften the energy between me and Susan so I can do my job and get this product launched successfully. After that, I’ll set a new goal!”

Right now is a great time for you to get a journal and start writing in it every day or as often as you feel. Working your way into a new team is almost never a slam-dunk. You know from the other side of the equation how off-putting it can be when a new team member walks in and starts telling everyone else what to do.

At least, you know that people can often have the impression that a newcomer is too quick to change things and make pronouncements without taking the time to understand the organization’s history and social dynamics. Take the time and make friends with Susan. Whether she stays in the company or leaves, I guarantee you’ll be glad you did!

All the best,

Liz

Liz Ryan is the CEO and founder of Human Workplace.